Sherlocked

Well I'm still alive! I've officially beaten the DIPG statistics as of Sunday. This was a big moment for me as the available statistics are the only indicator I've ever had of the severity of Brian's presence. I'm fully aware that they are inaccurate, especially because of my age but it was still a big moment for me. Few people think it's silly and I shouldn't put myself down because of them, but that day was a celebration and a bloody good one at that. I woke up to a few 'your still alive!!!' Messages and received a few more throughout the day. I spent the day at my little sisters fifth birthday party during which, me and my 2year old sister snook off for some celebratory icecream and hot chocolate. A funny mix I know but you try saying no to her! cocktails at zizzi was next on the list, but not with the two year old, I upgraded my company... Slightly. We then went to the special edition of Sherlock at the cinema which was amazing although a tough couple of hours trying not to scream or cry. Incredible though! A necessary McDonald's pit stop on the way home to where a bottle of champagne sat waiting until midnight. We decided to wait until midnight Incase any busses decided to hit me or bears decided to eat me. With my rate of luck those were two probable endings to the evening... But I made it. The champagne was a Christmas present, so it hadn't collected any dust unlike the bottle of prosecco I had for my birthday. I finally opened it last week. When I first had it I decided to save it for when I moved into my new house, then I decided I'd save it for my hen night.... So I then decided I'll have it when I can say I am no longer stressed. Which is why last week I came to the realisation that I will forever be stressed and stuff it lets open it. No I didn't drink it alone... I had a lovely night with two very good friends. It's nice to be laughing so much again!

We went on a spontaneous drive to the Brecon Beacons last week. We visited the same place I went gorge walking with the CCF and I found the waterfall that I jumped off. It was incredible to just walk for hours reliving some of the best memories I have. I'm gaining more and more of these precious memories everyday, this is now the priority in my life and you readers feature in so many of them. I have been overwhelmed over the past couple of months by the number of messages out of the blue from past friends. They all start with "not sure if you remember me" and go on to say "I've been wanting to message for a while but didn't know what to say" so I'm just going to make it clear to all of you now. If you can read this blog via my Facebook... I remember who you are. Secondly, it doesn't matter what you say to me, if your unsure, just message me with a "hey" and I will start the conversation. The power of those messages is undescribable, they really make my week! It doesn't matter what footprint you have left on my life, just confirming that I have left a footprint on yours really means the world to me. So if you are thinking of getting in touch, do it! I'm open about absolutely anything and there really isn't anything wrong you can say other than 'get well soon' I cannot describe how painful those words are to people with a terminal diagnosis.

Back to the medical updates, I had an endocrinology test today. This was checking that my body is able to produce enough cortisone (steroid) naturally. I had to stop my medication yesterday which has made me incredibly tired. They took some blood today before giving me a really painful injection. They waited half an hour and took another blood test. The injection was to encourage my body to produce cortisone. The comparison of the blood samples will show wether my body is able to do this. If I've failed the test I'll have to continue my medication so fingers crossed. I'll have the results next week.

In the spirit of Sherlock I'll end this post with a quote from the recent season that really meant a lot to me as it incredibly relevant to the way I'm trying to process this diagnosis, and the message I'm trying to portray.

'Stress can ruin every day of your life, dying can only ruin one'